I Have a listing of Desirable Characteristics. Why is it problematic for ladies to devote?

Reader Question:

Me: 46 years of age, African-American male, pro career, homeowner, good looking, 20-year-old boy. I date outside of my personal competition. I will be in good shape.

It seems just as much as women desire a committed commitment, they don’t really wanna commit to me personally. I really do have a “list” of desirable attributes — appealing, able to eliminate her finances, a social or nondrinker and someone that is actually eager and able to travel and carry out acts.

Why is it difficult for women to dedicate whenever I give outward signs and symptoms of wanting to maintain a loyal commitment?

-Mark (Ca)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Solution:

Dear Mark,

Indeed, so many women are acting like men (or how they THINK males act) consequently they are staying away from dedication. With that said, i’ll tell you there are still a lot more women who want a secure accessory than perhaps not.

I am wondering precisely why you might seem to get keen on women that prevent a great relationship. Could this become your choice in objectives?

My recommendation is always to consult with ladies that you will most likely not initially be drawn to and watch should you decide warm-up in their eyes. Often the incapacity to track down a secure relationship is related to the anxieties of abandonment.

Quite simply, we opted for partners exactly who can’t get near protect you from getting “dangerously” close and risk abandonment.

Take to matchmaking the type of individual you’ve never, actually dated prior to. Go slow. And focus on your emotions along the way.

Do you really be easily jealous, wish to control the woman time or wish seal the deal too fast? The trick is consist of your self and quell your own worries.

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